June 2009
63 posts
copycats:
True Love Will Find You in the End -...
May 2009
44 posts
“Now they’re saying that we can’t have gay marriage because it would confuse the...”
– This Is Your Kid On Gay Marriage | TV | A.V. Club (via frogcynic) (via maisavant) (via danielfaraday) (via trapeze) (via bandages)
Chat with Nigerian Scammer Part II, 5/28/09
me: Good morning, busy "banking" I assume?
NATWEST: Good day
me: yeah, it is.
So, what does your day-to-day look like?
NATWEST: Fine
me: Great, not really what I was asking, but ok.
I was wondering why your "bank" uses a Gmail account?
Because, the last bank that I got 3.2 million dollars from had its own domain name and everything.
Yours is just customercare.natwestbankuk@gmail.com
Natwest Bank couldn't afford a domain of its own?
NATWEST: I have no talk with you
me: What? Why?
You said you have my money in your "bank?"
NATWEST: You have made it cleared to us that its not your money
me: How?
I thought that you "ROUNDED UP ALL NECESSARY CONSULTATIONS WITH
THE BANK OF ENGLAND EXECUTIVES, AS REGARD TO THE TRANSFER OF YOUR (my) FUND"
I am very confused.
Michael?
Michael, you don't seem to be a man of your word.
hello?
I am very sad right now Micheal, I was hoping to have this money.
NATWEST is offline. Messages you send will be delivered when NATWEST comes online
Chat with Nigerian Scammer, 5/27/09
So, about a week ago, I responded to one of those Nigerian bank scams with an email saying something along the lines of "give me my money, I am ready." Low and behold, I log in this AM and one of these clowns appears in my Gchat:
me: I want my money.
Michael, this isn't a joke. I want my money now.
Give me my money.
NATWEST: OK
me: awesome send it on over
I am ready
In fact, why don't you give me your address and I will have my boys pick it up for me.
NATWEST: SEND THE REQUESTED INFORMATION AND YOU WILL RECEIVE YOUR MONEY YOUR MONEY IS INTACT AND SECURE HERE IN OUR BANK GET BACK TO US WITH THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION
me: WHY DO YOU WRITE IN ALL CAPITALS?
NATWEST: I DECIDS SO
me: You know Michael, I would be much more comfortable dealing with a banker who can spell. "I DECIDS SO" isn't really the most reassuring phrase to hear from a banker.
NATWEST: How do you mean?
what are you insunating.
me: Well, generally from my previous experience, bankers can, you know, spell and use basic sentence structure.
I am "insunating" that you are a fraud.
Or shall I say, full of crap.
Or that I think you are trying to scam me.
I give you my information, you steal my money, I never get my 3.4 million.
NATWEST: scam you?
me: yes, me.
NATWEST: hey dont use that word scam on me
me: You see, money isn't free, no one ever gets sent a random 3.5 million out of nowhere, so you sir are a scam artist, and trying to get me to give you my information to take my money.
scam scam scam.
NATWEST: any more
right this is all i want to hear from you
me: ok, I am sure you are busy giving away your millions
It must be really rough
Keep it up with the ALL CAPS, that really does the trick, lets them know you are legit.
NATWEST: its now obvious you are not the right fully beneficiary of the fund
me: Yea, I am sure, sorry I tipped you off.
How will you know when you find the "right fully beneficiary?"
NATWEST: you are not
foregt the money
me: Right, but that wasn't what I asked.
I am sure you will find them. I have faith in you.
You are really smart.
OK so I have forgotten the money.
NATWEST: better do
me: yea
totally
So, how did you get into this whole scamming thing?
Is this your part time gig?
I am thinking of getting into this myself and was looking for some tips.
I am thinking the first step is get some fake money.
Done and done.
I am unclear about step 2.
Michael?
Hello?
NATWEST: yes
me: I asked you a few questions.
NATWEST: keep that to yourself
ok.
me: I am not sure what that means.
Like I said, I am thinking of getting into this myself and was looking for some tips.
I know that you are really busy "banking" right now, but could you help a brother out?
Michael?
Cameron's House is For Sale. →
For as little as $11,425/month you can own a piece of 80s nostalgia!
R.I.P. Jay Bennett →
Also:
Magnificently Not Defeated: An Interview with Jay Bennett
Wilco ex-member sues frontman Jeff Tweedy
Bennett Vs. Tweedy Court Documents
copycats:
Jealous Guy - Elliott Smith originally...
May 22 Mix
A mix for the long weekend, or not. I know that when I think of Memorial Day, one of the first things that comes to mind is the jaded-love country rockin of Miranda Lambert.
The full set list:
I Woke Up Today, Port O’Brien
Gunpowder And Lead, Miranda Lambert
Savion Glover, P.O.S.
Honey I Been Thinking About You, Jackie Greene
Frug, Rilo Kiley
Play The Drum, Zeph & Azeem
Old...
The Soft Bulletin Turns 10. →
Ten years ago, the Flaming Lips released their ninth and possibly best album to date. Stereogum has collected an assortment of covers from the worlds of indie, jazz, pop, folk, and even a cappella to give an idea of the album’s far-reaching impact.
May 19 Mix
Also be sure to peep out Bad.Habits’ mix, this lady knows what’s up:
I Don't Watch LOST (Yes, I do).
Dr. Chang: When were you born?
Hurley: 1931.
Dr. Chang: You're 46?
Hurley: Yeah.
Dr. Chang: So you fought in the Korean War?
Hurley: There's no such thing.
[Pause]
Dr. Chang: Who's the president of the United States?
[Pause]
Hurley: Okay, dude. We're from the future.
Sometimes We Mean It Mix. →
8 Tracks is a great site. Every week or so, I will make a mix and put it up here.
New Wilco
Still listening to the new Wilco album. I love this band so much that I almost don’t know what to do with myself.
[pic via eargoggles.files.wordpress.com]
“A lotta cats get up at an age around, in their early 30’s, and they start to...”
– Sample from Brother Ali’s Good Lord. Perhaps Gil Scott-Heron?
I’ll Fight - Wilco.
New Wilco song from the...
WatchO’Reilly uses Nazi propaganda to defend torture, Olberman makes him his bitch.
Passive Aggression Works.
I send important paperwork/legal documents to people as part of my job. Every couple of months I find someone trying to tell me that they didn’t receive something that I sent—Not that they lost it, that I never sent it. Obviously, as I am not a moron, I keep proof of send and receipt for every document that leaves my office and can always prove that I sent said document to them, and...
I'd Be A Shoo-In
thejerkstore:
This morning, my company sent out an email saying they are looking for an “experienced blogger” to start writing posts for a new company blog they want to feature on our homepage. It pays $300 per month, which is more than I make by blogging now. Of course, part of the selection process includes “submitting example of past blog entries”, which, if I was stupid enough to do, would...
Thanks, Doc.
Doc: Well I don't think it's cancer, but I'm not really sure what it is. I can get you in to see a specialist in two weeks.
Me: What do I do between now and then?
Doc: Not much we can do.
Me: Sweet.
White Whine. →
A new white person complaint every day of the week.
Complaint #30
“Can’t they just make ski boots that are easier to walk in?”
“Those buttplug looking things on the monitor are old glass insulators they used...”
– Child of Crazy Ebay Mom (Link)
WatchThis one got me pretty heated. Olberman’s Worst Person In The World, Virginia Foxx, congresswoman from North Carolina’s 5th, had the gall to claim on the floor of the house that this whole Matthew Shepard hate crime victim thing is just a big hoax:
“I also would like to point out that there was a bill — the hate crimes bill that’s called the Matthew Shepard bill is...
